Wednesday, July 28, 2010

You Serve me and I'll serve you...

"Service" Developed an Allie
by Dr. Gary Chapman

When I discovered the high road of serving my wife, it was not long until she reciprocated. I found her doing little things that I had requested in the past. She held my hand as we walked in public, she smiled when I tried to make a joke, and she touched me as she walked by my desk.

Before long, our hostility was gone and we began to have positive feelings toward each other. I remember the first day I had the thought, "Maybe I could love her again." For months, I had not experienced feelings of love, but only pain, hurt, anger, hostility. Now, all that seemed to be gone and it was replaced by warm feelings.

I found myself thinking that I wouldn't mind touching her again if I thought she'd let me. I wasn't about to ask her just yet! But I thought, "I wouldn't mind if she wouldn't mind."

Romantic feelings were reborn and sexual intimacy, which seemed so far away, had become reality. We had come full circle. We were no longer enemies preaching at each other; we had become allies who were sensitive to each others' desires. We had discovered the royal road of "serving others."

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Do You Have a "Code Word"?
by Bill and Pam Ferrel

We encourage people to have a code word to indicate a desire for sexual interaction. This is especially helpful after having children because life becomes more hectic.

One couple we know buys a candle from every place they travel. When one of them is in the mood, it is very easy to read because all those candles are lit up as they walk in. "I'll light the candles" is their code.

Some people are so shy that just the thought of asking their spouse for sex out loud is too stressful.

One woman came up with a very unique solution to this dilemma. Every day before her husband came home from the office, she would write a number from one to ten on her side of the mirror, indicating her level of interest for that day. One meant "Not a chance" and ten meant "Where are you? I need you right now!"

Sometimes you don't need words to get the message across. Debra White Smith, in her book Romancing Your Husband, shares a story of a day she arranged a lingerie scavenger hunt for her husband. Around town she placed manilla envelopes, and in each was a piece of lingerie! Also in each envelope was part of a love song as a clue, and directions as to whom to see and where to go to find the next envelope.


This article content is taken directly from Red-Hot Mongamy by Bill and Pam Ferrel. Published by Harvest House, copyright 2006. Used by permission.

The Farrel's also wrote the popular book, Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti.

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